Understanding Stuttering

Understanding Stuttering - CBS Video

ISAD Online Conferences

The Power of Voice	Many Languages, One Voice
Reach Out to Children Who Stutter	YOU ARE NOT ALONE : Transforming Perceptions
Don't Let Stuttering Stop You....	"INTERNATIONAL STUTTERING AWARENESS" is everyday. . . We just celebrate it on October 22!
International Year of the Child Who Stutters	Community Vision for Global Action
Don't Talk ABOUT Us. . . . Talk WITH Us	Stuttering Awareness: Global Community, Local Activity
Don't Be Afraid of Stuttering	STUTTERING: More Than a Tangled Tongue
People Who Stutter, INSPIRE!	Sharing Stories - Changing Perceptions

Woman in My Life

Well, life is lonely without a partner. But Loneliness is not an issue as i have befriended my loneliness.

I have decided that in case I partner up at anytime in Life, I will do up only with a Woman with stutter, based on the presumption that only a Person with stutter can truely understand another person with stutter.

I dont want to view it as stutter "define" my life for me but something like as stutter "make a meaning of life" for me.

I must admit my first girlfriend dumped me not because of my "stutter" but because i was late in getting settled in Life.But she had once told me about me talking to her mother and brother and it sounded to me like she wants me to do it without a stutter.Well, I understand. But thats the reason I dont want a fluent women.  I can try and may manage to be in fluency at certain times.But when she expects me to be fluent at certain times, I really should say "You should hook up with a fluent person like you".

Another reason, being a Man, I am the one who should ask a women for a date, and since i am open about my stutter and i openly stutter, I don't think I should ask fluent women for a date, since its pretty reasonable for them to expect a man without a stutter. Also if its two persons with stutter, they wont ever be out of topic, since the matter of "working on stammer" will always be there.

Anyways, building up a long term profession is more important than having a partner.

To end the post, as someone said,  its not the destination, but this shitty journey that matters more

Limited Edition - I stutter

Thats not just some silly rap talk.. I have something which only 1 in a 100 has - A speech impediment - A Bloody Stammer.

Therapy Session 4 @ Canterbury Speech Clinic

So, half of my sessions are over.

Today, i had role play sessions like booking an appointment in telephone with a docter and like me standing in a Supermarket Checkout Counter as a service person.

I was shown the videos, even though i felt a little awkward with my voice. I was told I should get that feeling out of me because I long as i don't stutter it is what that counts and the listeners wont really distinguish any unnaturality.

I can see, they were encouraging and appreciating my fluency continuously.  Yeah, even i wish i was fluent like that often. Seems its a reasonable and  possible thing to achieve.

I was taken on a small walk outside while on a conversation, maybe to check how i am transferring my fluency outside. A specific question that striked me is "whether the level of fluency comes naturally to me" and it was an "Yup". Its good when i think that indeed "sometimes" fluency comes naturally to me.

I then remembered what a speech therapist back in Kerala said to me. That my level of stuttering is what i can come out of. Maybe when i am before speech therapists, my stutter becomes mild-moderate.  But there are indeed times in real life , i have a severe stutter.

I was told that don't go hard on myself when I stutter. Even though i aim for a no stutter level, i should be ready and comfortable to face a stutter scale of 2-3.   I was told not to have high expectations of a completely fluent speech.

My Assignments. To prepare for a speech like thing before them and see a rugby game this weekend. Cool!

Keep in Mind when Talking with a Person with Stutter

1) Listen to the content of the message rather than to how the message is coming out.

2) People who stutter know what they want to say; they just need more time getting their message out. Resist the temptation to finish the sentences or fill in words.

3) Telling a person with stammer to slow down, relax, or take a deep breath usually does not help either.
If you really want the person to slow down, try using a slower, more relaxed speaking rate yourself. This may help relieve the feeling of time pressure and it will show that you have time to talk.

4) Let your posture, your facial expressions, your manner, and your voice show that you are listening and are interested

5) People who stutter usually have more difficulty controlling their speech on the telephone.

6) And in my case, I am Cool with talking about my stutter and so don't be hesitant to enquire about my stutter thinking that 'its rude'.

Stutter Island (Fantasy)

The name has a striking similarity to the name of a Scorsese Movie and yes, its not coincidental. The idea popped up from some imaginative Stuttering Arena Member and i think its Cool. An island where only people with a stutter is allowed. "The Stutter Island".

Its not like we can keep on stuttering in their all our life (but that's accepted too).  Its like we all know each and all have a stutter. So we support and encourage each other to manage or overcome the stutter.

It has an social and economic infrastructure of its own, everything run and entirely involving People with a Stutter. So their is no extra pressure on us with regards to Employment and Networking. Its Fair enough considering the fact that 1% of the population on Earth has a stutter and they face significant difficulties with their communication in a world of fluent people.

Stutter Island

Err! Thats some other island. I know

My imagination all sums up to "Shorn in Wonderland".

Science of Stuttering

NIDCD scientists have identified three such genes—one on chromosome 12 and two on chromosome 16—that are the source of stuttering. The three genes, called GNPTAB, GNPTG, and NAGPA, work together to help in the breakdown and recycling of cellular components. Interestingly, other mutations in GNPTAB and GNPTG are tied to two serious metabolic disorders, called mucolipidosis (ML) II and III, which are also caused by problems with cellular recycling. Researchers are now studying how this defect in the recycling of cell components leads to specific deficits in speech fluency.

http://www.nidcd.nih.gov/health/voice/stutter.html

Yeah. Science is Cool.

Therapy Session 3 @ Canterbury Speech Clinic

Its just yesterday that I have decided that i will cut down myself from Facebook and blogging since i am going very pathetic on studies with my 6 months course in NZ. Its a level 7 course in NZQA and i am all by myself to somehow try to pass it by December , so that i can get a visa extension.

I should face stutter in my real life rather than through my Facebook statuses and blogging. I dont want any crutches. Let others know i stammer from my talk rather than through my status's.

But i feel i should blog down my Therapy Sessions, because at least i can look back to it myself.

I was given a list of situations and ask to mark 1-5 scale for my anxiety level

(Again Scales, whats with them and scales? They say its to quantify everything and to find variations). They say its an American thing and i can understand since American techniques always try to quantify things and put calculus into everything(lessons from my past economic studies).

But Also, Ive seen in a Hollywood Movie in which a English lecturer asking students to tear off and throw away a page from a book which dealt with the American way of measuring poetry with graphs.

There were many words like rap talk and bully talk in the list. Must be the Yo ! types which i don't do normally. They said the words came in because it was all American.

I had role play sections like me going to a bank to start an account, giving self introduction and giving phone numbers and going to a gas station(I haven't yet gone to a gas station here)

Anyways I am thankful to them for teaching me many other things in the Custom like rising from the seat when some one comes in and to shake hands.

I had my erroneous moments when i said "Good day Mate" to Jille. And i sat wearing my Jacket in there all throughout when i should have taken it out.

I was shown the recording of my own way of speech in those situation and i felt it pretty awkward. But i will need to go forward with it.

Maybe that videos will be shown to other students. I had signed an Acceptance Agreement before going for the free sessions.

And the homework this week was something i am sure to accomplish. Talk in the mirror for 10 minutes with a Naturality rate of 3-4.

Maybe Amanda backtracked from last weeks assignment because she know i wont do it. I live in midst of people who don't have that time for this and i also fail myself to take the controlled speech when i am in the common kitchen.

Ok. Blog up the next session.

I can see I have gained a little of writing skills through the blog

Love You Nina

The message she gives - Dont try to hide the stutter or manage the stutter.

Talk about the stutter.

Stuttering comes naturally to us. Why try to manage it or hide it and make it unnatural.

Lessons from a SLP who stutters

by Missie Imel Holmes

I was a moderate stutterer for years and would repeat parts of words (part word repetition), use 5 words when one would do(circumlocution), block badly (blocking, where no sound comes out but muscles are activated) and avoid many speaking situations like the phone, ordering at a drive through, talking to people I didn’t know. I never had speech therapy for it (therapist told my parents I didn’t stutter much while talking to her [I was in the 5th grade] and that I wouldn’t qualify for speech. I was embarrassed and ashamed and didn’t know how I would ever deal with this obtrusive communication problem for the rest of my life. My one savior was that I was an outgoing person and loved attention, especially when I was on stage acting in high school. I began to realize if I projected my voice and acted like I was someone else, my stutter disappeared. But I knew I couldn’t be someone else for the rest of my life. While in college, I decided to major in Speech Language Pathology to learn how to help others and myself at the same time. Unfortunately, even college didn’t provide adequate answers for me. I had to rely on my experience as a stutterer and teach myself. College did give me the research and techniques that had been successful, but didn’t tell me HOW to implement them.

I taught myself how to lower my vocal tone, take a breath and relax my throat muscles and use light articulatory contacts, as well as tell people that I stuttered and to have patience with me and to say the work when I could not (that worked for me, but I know it doesn’t work for all). I simply decided my stuttering wasn't going to control me. With that frame of mind, I slowly began to gain more confidence and speak fluently. Even being a SLP for 17 years has not cured my stuttering; I still stutter in times of stress, but I do it with confidence and utilize my techniques. Humor helps too. J

“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” Truer words were never spoken and, in my mind, aptly relate to stuttering. What can you change? Yourself and how you approach your stutter. What can’t you change? People’s reactions. My empathy for people who stutter is great, as I know what they are going through. And to be honest, I cannot put myself in the shoes of those whose stutter is so severe that they avoid all communication. But I do know that this is a disorder that cannot be tackled alone. You must have a support system in place. Someone to be with you during the early months of treatment; to support you, to remind you, to give you a cue or prompt when you forget to use your techniques. And there are many techniques out there than can help. I will talk more about that very, very soon. Until then, know yourself, trust yourself and continue communicating, no matter what. J

A mate's FB note

My Quest for FluencY
by Rajesh Bhandari

My name is Rajesh Bhandari. I am 20 years old and was born in Dehradun, India. My stuttering began when I was ten years old. As far as I remember, my speech was fluent until I came in the  fifth grade. I didn’t receive early therapy as a kid. I cannot recall any major difficulties because of my speech until I entered the 10th grade when I was around 15 years.  I had a lot of friends and enjoyed thoroughly in my school life. But still as, I reflect on my early years, I do have many regrets. One is that there was not a single person who could help me out of this terrible situation. I do remember everyone laughing at me on some occasions and all I wanted to do at that time was hide or run away.I was extremely embarrassed at times.

In a few of the classes, the new Teacher would ask us all to introduce our self and I remember the fear I had whilst waiting for my turn. The other students would say their name without thinking twice while I used to be become more and more nervous as my turn came closer. When finally my turn came, I couldn't get the words out. As a typical 10th grader, I really cared about what my peers thought of me which further aggravated my stutter, especially on the telephone. . I do, however, wish that someone would have recognized my fear and helped me to overcome it at that time and by doing so, maybe I would not have this much problem today.

This was the beginning of "my real problem."

I started avoiding every speaking situation. You can imagine how this felt. I hadn’t received any kind of therapy at that time. The type of stuttering I had at that time is called "stoppage".  But still, I never let my stuttering keep me from having fun  in school. My ambitions were high. As I progressed through school, the situation worsened and I came to accept that I could never speak in front of a group. I felt that I would always have difficulty expressing myself to strangers.

 After school, I  decided to pursue career in Engineering . I have vivid memories of struggling to give my name and address at the initial registration or when answering roll call and in the presence of teachers and pupils that I had not previously encountered. I developed strategies to protect myself from shame and embarrassment. Fear assumed the role of guardian, shielding me from experiencing the negative emotions that I felt when I stuttered .At that time , I hadn’t met any other stutterer. So naturally, at times a feeling of loneliness engulfed me.

At the end of 2nd year of graduation, I decided to take speech therapy. I learned some techniques to become more fluent, but I still stuttered. It wasn't as bad as when I was in high school. But still, I was not totally satisfied as avoidance and substitutions were very high. Within a month, relapse was visible. I had a good friend circle in university and I kept to my circle not caring about others. So I kept strictly to my comfort zone .I never talked about my stammering with anyone. It was like a forbidden topic, kind of like an unspoken truth in my friend circle.  

I attended my first SHG meeting at the end of 2nd year organized by Sachin Sir. It was an wonderful experience for me. For the 1st time in my life, I met other people having the same problem as mine. After that, I started browsing the TISA blog and other stammering sites but my outside world was still the same. Avoidance, hiding, shame, guilt, etc.

Another significant step was disclosing my stammer through social networking websites( a thing I would be scared to even think about before)

 I have almost 200+ awesome  friends who stammer from across  the globe  on my Facebook  page. I feel really lucky to be surrounded by such friends who genuinely like me and would go well beyond their capabilities to help me .I interact with them regularly. That’s clearly the positive side of my stammering. Slowly and slowly it is helping me to be more open about my stuttering. I get emails from various PWS which encourages me further. Hence slowly and slowly I’m coming out. I’m getting actively involved in SHG activities and in the online world.

All my life, I have been fighting “My stuttering” – a thing that burdened me from the childhood .It was one of my characteristics, a part of my self-image, my scary monster .The most important thing is that I have stopped getting frustrated over my failures. I have stopped being afraid. In fact, I have become so fascinated with my monster that I have decided to befriend it. I have some good days and some bad ones too. I’m learning to live with it, it will always be there. If it wasn’t for my stuttering I would still be that person today. I wouldn’t have even bothered to improve myself and become a better person…and this is true not only for stuttering but for any emotional pain and challenge you experience in life.

 For us (PWS), Everyday is like a big Challenge. We should accept our stammer from  heart. It needs a great deal of concentration, hard work and commitment. I know it’s easier said than done.

I would like to end this post with one of my favourite quotes:

"Anything in life which gives you pain is a source of happiness and strength… you just need to learn how to use it for your advantage”

:-)

1) Its not required to be engaged or busy all the time. Its a grace to sit, sleep or go around simply without thinking anything or for no reasons. We wont be taking anything to the other world.

2)A Life without being online is possible and good(No Facebook, No Blog). Cut off the Internet Addiction.

3) Work hard on whats important in Life. Face the success's with a smile. Face the failure's with a smile. Greet the mates with a smile. Greet the loneliness with a smile.

You manage it so well, Mate.

one of the most sensible reasons for stammering not popping up while singing


Gosh...doing it for one hour a day????
I really need that mentality

SpeakEasy New Zealand Leaflet

I blogger

Why do i blog?

Its a statement that i have accepted my stammer. 

When someone asks me about my hobbies, I can always say "Blogging" is one of them.

And when i die, a piece of my life will be left behind in the Google Blogger Servers(if they archive and continue to provide web services)

On skype, from India, My Dad asked me about my first girlfriend and my mom said she was depressed and thought for a moment I was talking about my dog in India which had passed out, when they saw  the post http://t-tisa.blogspot.com/2011/09/go-for-it.html

I refused to answer because I believe they are my "personal matters" .

My dad asked about me about my therapy. I said he can read it in my posts

I know you are trying to talk with me, Dad (I know you will read this too, my Daddus)

Daddus, you know all this because I blog.

What makes me to continue with my blog. Because I continue to live.

To end the post, as someone said,  its not the destination, but the journey that matters more.

Kiwiland

Out of all the modesty, they made the flightless small bird of Kiwi, their National symbol.

They pump in public money to preserve the Maori Tradition(untypical of the western culture), even though the Maori's are not Indigenous.

And as far as i know its the only country in the world that has got the Sign Language(for deaf people) as one of their official Language

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/New_Zealand_Sign_Language

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_official_languages

And heck, i never expected to get free therapy sessions worth hundreds of dollars in a kiwi clinic.

And heck. i never expected to pass my first interview in a kiwi store by starting with "I bloody Stammer" and I am earning my first income here as casual wages

And who said Black is not a Cool colour?

Kiwi Rugby team is nicknamed All Blacks and looks cool

Kiwi Criket team is nicknamed Black Caps and looks cool

Silver Fern

Therapy Session 2 @ Canterbury Speech Clinic

I tried to implement the technique and was told that my stuttering rate has reduced 4% for that test. It was 19%  for the previous test.  It may be because i was getting relaxed and comfortable in speaking before them.

I am asked to speak 15 minutes everyday with a single person of my choice.
I will have to speak at Naturality Scale of 4-5(medium unnaturality) and a stuttering rate of 1 (no stuttering) or maybe 2 (slight stuttering).

I am also asked to think about daily routines and come up with a list of speech situations. 

Rate them 1-5 (1=no anxiety, 5=high anxiety) and bring them for the next session.

I am told not to prepare for any situations.  I often have trouble saying "Thank You" in metro buses and do prepare beforehand for that.

I decided to continuously practice saying to myself "Speak at a naturality scale of 5 with soft contacts" because i want to speak without struggle. But i don't practice any other words or sentences since i don't want to prepare beforehand or have a differentiation of easy and hard words(as i was told) 

Disorder ?????   :-(

Feel the fear

Once i feel the fear there are naturally two things that can follow up

1) I can succumb to the fear, retreat from the act , and feel the failure also.

2) I can go forward to do it anyway and have the  positive feeling of getting yourself into the act, irrespective of the outcome.

Reminds me of an old post
http://isstutter.blogspot.com/2010/11/phone-rings.html

To end the post, as someone said,  its not the destination, but the journey that matters more.

SpeakEasy Christchurch

Barry, the branch president gave me a ride to and back from the room where SpeakEasy meetings are held. Ellen, a speech therapist also came in for the meeting. It was a rainy night. So no one else turned up. It was just Barry, Me and Ellen.

Its indeed good that when services of speech therapists are very hard to get in India, they are available  for support group meetings here.

It was my first time in a support group here in New Zealand and i should say that i am indeed relieved to have attended it. Its always good to be a part of a support group where the techniques of speech can be openly practiced.

I am asked by Ellen that before the next meeting i should tell my lecturer that since i have a stutter, i do have little trouble in asking questions in class sometimes. Because there is no point in going to University if i am not asking  my doubts to the lecturer. Hope i will have the courage to implement it.

Since not many persons turned up, we called an early night.

To end the post, as someone said,  its not the destination, but the journey that matters more.